Ingredients
Smoked Haddock - Nice stuff, not shite with all the orange dye, boned.
Leek - a big fat one
Onion - small one, if you like
Celery - a bit, not loads
Rice - Arborio, or the other one, two fat handfuls
Stock - chicken, or something, A jugful
Wine - white - a good glug
Parsley - a nice bit, chopped
Eggs - two, fresh, not out of the cunting fridge
Milk - less than a cowful
Bay leaf
Right
Chop the leek in half lengthways, then finely slice, chop the onion and celery finely if you're having it, and fuck in a medium hot pan with plenty butter and some salt, and soften it- don't fucking colour it of fuck it up.
Horse the haddock in a pan of milk with a bayleaf and some pepper corns and gently simmer it for 5-10 minutes, remove, peel off the skin, flake up the fish nicely, and set aside. Keep a bit of the milk.
When the leek is soft, langer in the rice, and a bit more butter, stir and coat the rice in the butter so it's nice and crackly, and after a few minutes lob inthe wine,
Stir until the wine is gone, then add stock ladle by ladle until the rice is soft, keep the fucker stirred.
Meanwhile, poach an egg. You may wish to use some sort of special egg poaching pan for spastics if you're a huge gay like DBD
When the rice is about done, add some milk (just a bit, and sieve it to take out all the fucking shite), then the haddock, and some peas (no, they're not in the ingredients)
Season it all up, stir through, fuck into bowls, and top each one with a poached egg and some parsley.
Ace.
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