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| Another ten minutes - Remote Control. |
| Posted on 23/09/04 at 07:48 by NGONGE |
Last night, I broke the remote control. I was really looking forward to sitting down and exercising my thumb when I dropped it. I quickly got up to retrieve it. I stood on it instead. The crunching sound was worse than crushing a cockroach. I almost cried. I had a very long evening ahead of me and had no TV to watch! It was stuck on one channel! Every house in our street has a satellite dish. I bet they all have several remote controls. They were all sitting and flicking away from channel to channel. While, I, the best channel flicker of the lot, had no remote control. I decided to do something about it. It was nine in the evening and there were no shops open. Not ones that sell remote controls anyway. I remembered that our local ASDA superstore is open 24 hours a day. Ive never been to a supermarket that late at night. I remembered reading about single people meeting in supermarkets at night. I remembered the common people song. I wanted to be like common people. Common people own working remote controls. I got dressed and went out. I decided to walk all the way there. I did. I took a short cut. I walked through the park. It was dark and scary. Even though I know London has no wild hyenas, I could still hear their laughs in the distance. I told myself to calm down. There are no hyenas in London. I repeated that sentence as I walked. I started singing it to the tune of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star. No Ha Yee Naas IN LON DON.
I kept looking behind me as I walked. I thought I saw two shadows. I looked again. There were two men back there! Were they following me? Were they ghosts? Maybe they were muggers? Why do muggers hang around empty parks at night anyway?
I thought of running. I decided against it. What if I tried to run away from these muggers but ran into the hyenas path instead?
I told myself to stop being silly and walk normally. I did. As I did so, I kept a mental note of the positions of every loose stick, empty bottle and stone I saw in my way. If these guys were muggers or the hyenas were real, I would need some weapons to defend myself. I thought about taking my lighter out of my pocket and inhaling some of the gas. If they attack me, Id light it up and blow fire in their faces. It wasnt a practical idea. I finally decided to just walk quicker. My heart was beating so fast. I was skipping all over. I got to the exit of the park and looked around me to see if the muggers were still following. They were not there. I relaxed and walked on. I got to the store. Everything looked shiny and new. I bought a DVD player, some fresh muffins, a childrens videotape and a boxing magazine. I almost forgot to buy the remote control. I went back and looked at all the remote controls they had. Different makes. Different sizes. Different prices. So many choices! I bought two. I paid for my shopping and left. I was going to walk through the park again. I remembered the muggers. I decided that it wasnt safe to walk through the park while carrying all this shopping; it would only slow me down if I needed to run. I went back to the store and phoned for a cab. After ten minutes of waiting, the cab arrived. He wanted to know my name! I told him. He nodded and got in his cab. I got in too. I told him my destination and sat back wondering why he wanted to know my name. I couldnt wonder anymore so I asked him. He told me it was company policy. I told him that it did not make any sense because I didnt tell the guy on the phone my name. He told me that it didnt matter. I told him that it did. I asked him for his name. He said, Why do you want to know? I said, Because you already know my name . He said, Whats that got to do with you knowing my name . I said, Its the polite thing to do, man . He seemed to panic. I told him not to worry and that I was only curious, I wasnt going to report him or anything. He seemed to panic even more. He told me his name. I thought he was lying. I told him so. He seemed to get upset and told me that he didnt want to continue with the conversation! I apologised and asked him for his real name. He refused to tell me. I asked him if he had anything to hide. He told me it was none of my business. I asked him not to lose his cool. I was only trying to make conversation. He stopped talking to me. I carried on talking but like a spoilt child, he ignored me. We got to my house. I paid him and wished him a safe journey. He still ignored me and drove off. I was irritated by his behaviour but I soon cheered up when I remembered my new remote control.
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